The Weekend Of Retardation

I've had one of the most bizarre weekends. More bizarre than last weekend perhaps? With the grueling vice of Jagermeister hovering above me twenty four seven, joblessness, no cell phone, being ginger and being sun burned, pulling a hammy (no pun intended) playing slow pitch soft ball with our friends from "The Well", I don't know what the fuck is going on!?!?! I had this dream that I was hanging out with John Lennon and Paul McCartney and I was telling Paul to teach me how to play "A Taste Of Honey", He was like muttering stuff to John, and refused my request. I split like a banana and I can't remember what happened next but it's not necessary for anything. Kyle and Joe were making fun of me cause I was wanting to talk to this super cute girl at The Banshee but I couldn't do it. Kyle swoops right the fuck in and gets the honey. He comes back telling me all about how she's from Canada and has this super cute smile, and just rubbing it in all in his little Burns way. Meanwhile, Kelly and I are making swastikas out of paper coasters and just saying funny things. I don't know? I am supposed to go filming with Brian right now. Maybe something amazing will happen?